Sunday, November 21, 2010


So I mentioned a while back that anxiety attacks have made a surprise appearance in my life.  Unfortunately they are not going away, at least not yet.  I do have hope that this is just a weird bump in the mental road, but until then I have to find ways to deal with it.

One of these ways is medication.  I know a lot of people get all weird about taking pills, preferring to try and get through it with sheer willpower.  I am not one of those people.  If I can't control it myself (and seeing as they have only gotten worse over the past 6 months, obviously I can't) I see absolutely no problem and feel absolutely no shame about going to the doctor and getting shit taken care of.  Sure, it's a drag having to take pills every day.  But you know what?  I feel better and really that's all that I care about.  Feeling as if you've lost control of your mind is scary, and if a pill or two a day can fix that?  Sign me up.

The other way I've decide to try and make myself feel better is by joining a gym.  Considering that money is one of my main anxieties, this endeavor was made possible by my mom, who is the best mom in the world (everyone says that, but I assure you in this case it's true.)  I've always thought that exercise was beneficial not only physically but also mentally, and now I can honestly say from experience that it is indeed.  The most surprising part of all this?  I absolutely LOVE going.  I never thought in a million years that I would.  I was at work the other day and at around two o'clock I found myself thinking, "I can't wait to get to the gym."  Weird, right?

Now of course this could just be because it's something new, and I also get to buy new sneakers and yoga pants and sweats and stuff.  Anyone who knows me would tell you that anything that gives me an excuse to buy new things without feeling guilty is something I'm gonna be into, but I'm hoping that's not the case.  I'll have to get back to you on that.